A friend at work said this “Sure Hitler was a jerk and all, but he made this amazing quiche.”

Maybe instead of war we could get Saddam and George together for an intense night of Crash Bandicoot.

So I found out that that guy who kidnapped Elizabeth Smart said her new name was “The Remnant that will return,” so I decided that from now on I will be known as “Guy who bought a taco.”

I tell ya. You know you’re getting old when you say “Is that the biggest container of Cottage Cheese they have?”

Why is it that when you have a ton of free time you barely get anything done, yet when you have a little bit of free time, you seem to get plenty done?

I found a pretty cool quote from a Dean Koontz book – “How fortunate I’ve been to live long enough to recognize the subtle but undeniable fading of my youthful stamina and spryness. To hell with those poets who celebrate the beauty and the purity of dying young, all powers intact. I’d be grateful to …

So yesterday I was at the mall with a couple friends, when we noticed a man chasing a clown. I’m not kidding. A man dressed entirely like Bozo. The guy chases him down, catches him, says to him “Rule’s a rule,” then threw the clown into the trunk of his car. I’m not making this …

I’ve been noticing that one thing that changes when you mature is how you measure happiness. I remember not too long ago when I would measure happiness by the number of times I went to Best Buy. I’m learning, however, that happiness does not correlate with what you purchase, but what you make of what …